“Physics? Isn’t that like English?”

“Sitting shotgun is a human right.”

“I really am Jeffree Star but broke and female.”

“I’d say my boyfriend could fight you but he’s a spaghetti noodle, so maybe not.”

“I drank a Bang this weekend. I felt like I could be killed in the blink of an eye, by the blink of an eye. But that I could simultaneously kill every single deity that anybody has ever believed in, ever.”

Person 1: “I don’t want Trump to be impeached, I don’t want Mike in office.”

Person 2: “Honestly, I kinda like the idea of Trump being impeached, just for kicks.”

“Just because a person exists, doesn’t mean you have to kill them.”

“Why does that girl have a knife in her hands?”

“I can’t say this, I just need to learn how to use my chopsticks.”

“If you were a star in the sky, you would shine the dimmest.”

“She cut her hair, now she looks like Dora the Explorer.”

“So at your wedding, Anthony is gonna kill all your kids with a lightsaber?”

“Yo hair look like dookie straws.”

“I must not be a furry because I can’t draw dogs for anything.”